The concept of "Living My Best Orgasmic Life" showed up on my vision board 7 years ago. I really had no idea where I was going with it but I knew that this is how I wanted to live. I wanted to live fully alive in my body, my sexuality and my spirituality. It took a lot of twists and turns to become this woman. Three children,an adopted child,a divorce, death of my mother,father and two brothers and incredibly devasting break up with a man I thought was my soul mate and a STROKE. If I can live this so can you.
Here is 100 techniques I use and teach to transform your life. So you can start living "Your Best Orgasmic Life"
For Your Life....
1. Every chance you get, do deep belly breathes through an open mouth. Keep your body oxygentated. This will help you to feel everything in your body more emotions, sensations all of it. This is really the hardest thing to do for many of us, we are so fearful to feel our emotions. Especially for men. I promise you if you don't feel it now it will keep showing up in your life in ways you don't want.
2. Make eye contact when you talk to people. Taking time to be present through the eyes is a simple way of making a meaningful connection with somebody.
3.Forgive others. Imagine that person you need to forgive sitting in front of you. As you inhale, imagine you are drawing love from their heart and delivering it straight to yours. And as you exhale, imagining your are circulating love back to them. Continue to do this for a few minutes. Feel your heart blast wide open as a result. (You might to do this a few times, believe me I know how hard this) If you can't get there alone in my tantra sessions I do a cutting cords energy session. This is when we chuck it in the fuck it bucket and move on.
4. When you are doing something, just do the one thing. Don't try to do 10 things at once. Devote your attention to that one thing like there is nothing left in the world to do.
5. Move your body, every single freaking day.
6. This goes back to number 1. If you feel fear ever, don't stuff it away or try to let it go. Breathe it in and love it like it is part of you. Let it scare the shit out of you and sit with you. You will be suprised the more you allow yourself to embrace fear, the more it will naturally dissipate.
7. Start your day by setting an intention on how you want your day to go. Before your feet it the floor. SET AN INTENTION. A big one.
8. Stretch your spine everyday in all directions. Your kundalini energy is your precious life force energy it moves through your spine. Keeping your spine flexible will give you more vitality and aliveness for the day.
9. Melt into every hug with your loved ones allowing every cell to merge with the one you are embracing. Otherwise, why even bother hugging? (take note woman hate it when you pat them on the back during a hug)
10. If somethings not working, release it. If its meant to be it will come back to you. This is incredibly hard for me, I love to convince people they need me. When I finally let all things that were not working in my life go. I became FREE.
11. If you see something beautiful in nature, resist the urge to film it or snap pictures and post in on social media. Instead, just allow yourself to be with it. I recently did this on a drive with Mt. Hood in the back drop. It was one of those rare clear Portland days and Mt. Hood was magnificent it all her glory. I pulled over got out of my car and just embraced all the beauty. I don't have the picture and nobody was there but me. But the moment will never leave my cells.
12. Go an entire day without judging or criticizing yourself or other people. Every time you start to do it, stop yourself and focus on your heart chakra. This will help you build that love muscle so you can approach everything from a heart centered place.
13. Next time you eat a meal, don't rush through every bite. Chew slowly and savor every moment of your tasting sensations. Developing your senses more will help you to feel your innate bliss more deeply. I make love to my food. You should take me to dinner. Ask Todd! He knows how sexy I eat.
14. If you feel stuck or stressed during the day, use sound to transform your energy. Take a deep breathe and open your mouth and then sigh out loudly. Do this 5 to 10 times it rearranges your brain automatically to a calm state.
15. Ever feel like you are not want to be in your life? To help move blockages or obstacles out of the way. Take up meditation. In the hindu tradition the practices they use for obstacles is invoking Ganesha who is the remover of obstacles. You can focus on invoking his energy during mediation in the middle of your day. OM Gam Gantapataye Namaha is his mantra. Use whatever you feel comfortable with.
16. Keep your root chakra(base of your spine) clear and balanced by going outside and standing in the grass for a minute. This will ground you and keep you stable in your physical experience. (always set an intention) Such as I AM grounded,stable and secure in my own life.
17. Keep your sacral chakra clear by placing your hands on your lingam(cock) or yoni (vagina) Breathe orange light down into this area until you feel heat. Then exhale, imagine orange light melting into your belly. This will help you heal your sexuality. (always set an intention) Such as I AM connected to all my pleasure in my body and am expanding my sexual and sensual experience.
18. Keep your solar plexus chakra clear (right above your navel)by imagining the sun beating in rays down and warming your belly. Doing this just for a few minutes will give you a boost and make you feel confident. This is especially important for men. This is your power point. Your will power. How you make shit happen in the world. You have seen men with guts or beer bellies. There solar plexus is not aligned and they have lost there will power and usually being demasculated at home or they feel no power in the work place.
19. Keep your heart chakra clear by tapping your chest. When you wake up in the morning, use your fingers to tap firm pressure all over your heart to wake up your love space. As you go about your day, use the energy from your heart to think,speak, and take inspired action. You will notice a big difference in how you feel and how you impact others around you. I would also suggest doing this before you speak to a loved one, go on a date and especially before you come see me. The more heart centered a man. The more alive is the woman.
20. Keep your throat chakra clear by singing or chanting. Don't let insecurity block off the power energy in your throat. Let yourself be free to express yourself. The throat chakra is a catalyst for change. When we free up our self expression, we can start living in alignment with our highest and most authentic self. I had a client that was constantly getting chronic sore throats. He was a non-believer in my woo-woo stuff until I asked him if he was allowed to talk about his needs, wants and desires in his home life. When he said no never. I asked him to let me clear his throat chakra. All the sudden he's speaking his truth and asking for what he wants and he hasnt had a sore throat in two years. (woo-woo stuff? haha)
21. Keep your third eye clear(between your eyebrow) by focusing on the space and feeling the energy circle. You can use any type of meditaion you choose but chanting OM silently is a quick and powerful way to increase your intuition.
22. Keep your crown chakra clear by imagining drawing energy from 300 feet up and envision the brightest light you have ever seen. (source,god,the universe) Let in enter your crown chakra like liquid gold. Just keep breathing and let it encompass your whole body all the way down out your feet into the center of the earth and let it flow back up. Do this as many times as you want. This will connect you to all that is and awaken your higher self to enlightment.
23. Read Osho's Book of Secrets to really dive in. I promise you it will illuminate the depths of your being. I usually carry copies of this in my studio and give them as a gift.
24. Master the art of acceptance. Write out a list of all the things you have been stuggling to accept in your life. Then go through all of them accept them as they are now for whatever reason and then say thank you and burn the fucking list.
25. Find beauty in the mundane. HINT: By being completely present and aware of your body, something as simple as doing the dishes can create an orgasmic feeling. I had to prove one time to a lover that I can have an orgasm doing dishes. It can be done.
26. Don't let addictions cloud your essence. You're stronger than that. I know I have been sober for 5 years. So go deeper to uproot it. Stop looking at the addiction as something you need to let go of. Instead look underneath the addiction and understand why its there. Is it depression,anxiety,disappointment, anger? You are the only one that knows your truth, Once you locate the feeling in your body just sit with the feeling. Allow it to overtake you. Cry,scream,beat up something (not a person) let it fill up every cell in your body. Breathe. Do this a little each day. I am a big lover of crystals amethyst is amazing for sobriety and clears all the negative and self destrcutive energy. You are the creator of your life. How do you want to live it? High or Alive?
27. Every time a thought disempowers you, interrupt it. Filter it out, Breathe and let the thoughts float away like clouds. Your life depends on you getting your thoughts clear.
28. Create a sacred space in your home. One that you can go to whenever you need to pray,chant,visualize, journal or reflect. The energy will be so mazing in this space it will keep you coming back over and over again. I have created this sacred space in my tantra studio, it is the ulimate healing space. No one wants to leave.
29. Protect your energy. Don't do things your heart is not into this. Boundaries people. BOUNDARIES!!!! Stay away from energy vampires, PERIOD!
30. Water. Drink the damn water and kombucha:)
31. Stop looking to be fullfilled by things outside of yourself. Love yourself more than anyone in the whole world. No one else can do this for you. It will never work. Love people with no attachment.
32. Stop being angry. Is it really worth it.
33. Know without a shadow of a doubt you have created everything in your life good or bad. Even if you did it unconsciously. Now start creating the life you really want. Ask, Believe and Receive (ALLOW IT)
FOR YOUR SEX LIFE
34. Start expanding your defination of sex. Take it beyond the typical. See sex as a presence. As a deep presence. See sex as a deep union. Start to use it as all forms of connection- an intimate conversation, a glance,eye contact a whisper, a touch. All of that is sex. Take none of it for granted. Devote yourself fully to each moment of connection, whether its a casual affair, a one night stand or the love of your life. (yes you can have a tantra encounter in casual affairs)
35. Sexual Energy is not something that exists in the genitals. Sexual energy is in your every cell. You are here because of sexual energy. Sexual energy is life force,prana,chi. It is what keeps you alive and nourished. Don't be afraid to lean into it. Don't be afraid to take it out of the bedroom and use it for fuel in other areas of your life.
36. Set aside time to learn belly breathing. Belly breathing is a pleasure inducing internal massage. 10 minutes a day would be ideal. Do it with your lover before sex or before self pleasure. Breath into your pleasure.
37.Send some love to your sacrum ay the base of your spine. It is full of sexual energy. Reach both hands back there and give yourself a sacrum massage.Do you ever notice that when you out your hand on the lower back of a woman what it does to her? It activates sexual energy. Do it more often.
38. A womans breast are a portal through which she can access deep fullfilling orgasm. Support your woman by devoting yourself to her breasts and whole chest area. Massage them, in circular motions outward not inwards. Spend lots of time here, because this will set the foundation for her to have a deep experience with you. Pay attention to how her body responds to your touch, her breathing and her face. Ask her what she needs. Encourage all women to cultivate a deep relationship with there breasts.
39. During love making or self pleasure, don't hold back any tension in your body,let it be all relaxed so that the sexual energy can move through you in every cell.
40.When you are with a partner, before you start, spend more time breathing together. Sit with your foreheads together activating and aligning your chakras and breath together. Spend time eyegazing and see the soul of this beautiful person. You will be amazed how mind blowing the sex will be. I call this "Spiritual Foreplay" its hot and enlightend and its SOUL SEX.
41. Let go of your attachement to "cumming" Sex shouldnt be about expectations. Allow the experience to be what it is, simply by being in every moment.
42. Hug your partner from behind and place your hands on their heart. Inhale together and when you exhale, imagine your hearts melting together.
43. Do your kegals. Men its your PC muscle. It builds the heat and moves your sexual energy to expand throughout your body with breathe and visualizing energy.
44.Tighthen your anal sphincter muscles as well. Will also help to activate sexual energy and keeps your prostate healthy.
45. Don't look for others for sexual fullfillment. You contain ulitmate orgasmic potential within. Her orgasm is also not your responsiblity. Encourage her to find her own orgasm with your guidance and support ofcourse.
46. What are you ashamed of when it comes to your sexuality? Journal about it. Bring it to light. Own it. Get very emotional with it. You might just find that the shame melts away. Remember there is no shame in sex as a whole its the stigma and loss of innocence some may have encountered. Make all your sexual encounters safe and consensual.
47. Don't be afraid to make sound during sex. Make all the noise you want. Sound is one of the biggest promoters of pleasure.
48. Treat women like the Goddess she is. See her, taste her, feel her.
49. Men let your woman worship you feel you,taste you and see you for the God you are.
50.Whenever you start to feel the sexual electricity alive in your body drop everything and breathe into into. Feel the channels of the masculine in your root chakra the base of your spine and your feminine energy in your sacral chakra. Not matter male or female we have both. Masculine and Feminine Energy let them merge.
51.Make time to explore all the parts of your body, especially the ones that you don't normally experience sexual sensation in. Caress yourself from top to bottom, breathing deeply as you do. You might be suprised what you find. I just recently have been having feet orgasms. Who would of thunk?
53. Sexual energy is primal. Which means it can help to liberate it when we make deep primal sounds. It can help to move you to places you didnt know were possible.
54. Strip away the armor. If you keep it on you will stifle orgasmic energy, Be Raw, Be Vulnerable, BE REAL.
55.When you are touching your partner it should stir up deep pleasure within you. Almost like you are touching yourself, Be so present in the giving it feels like recieving. I am so turned on and present when giving a blow job I have full blown orgasms. NOW THAT IS TANTRA.
56. Ask for what you want. Expression is the ultimate sexy. Sometimes I just ask, "What do you need" or "This is what I need from you right now to make me explode"
For Your Creative Life-
57.Your sacral chakra, is two inches below you navel and circles around your whole genital region. I lot of energy workers leave out the cock and vagina because of stigma but this is the home of your creative power. Its associated with the color orange. Keep orange you to stimulate creativity. And before you begin a creative project, imagine your body bathed in orange light.
58. Our Kundalini energy at the base of our spine is made up of creative energy. If we can harness it, we can spark a creative joy so deep that it makes the creative process an intoxicating pleasure. Whenever you're feeling stuck creatively, make circles with your spine as you breathe deeply. In my tantra sessions I do kundalini energy work to help you receive this awakening gift.
59. When the heart chakra is involved in the creative process this is called inspired action. Everything flows freely. Your worl will become laced with tremendous power. Your arms and hands are extentions of your heart, you can imagine heart energy flowing out of your arms and hands as you create. Notice how much easier it feels. Everyone has creativity, whether you are an attorney,accountant or a painter. We are creating something for the world to observe through our gifts.
60. Drop the need for everything to come out perfectly. The creative process can be messy. If we stifle the messiness, we risk our work being wesk,safe and generic. Do you ever notice some of the most beautiful things in the world our just a "HOT MESS"
61. If you're procastinating on a project, its time to start visualizing a positive fulfilling creative outcome. I am the queen of procrastinating. I learned to overcome this when I started weeding out what I was afraid of and started tuning into my life purpose. Start focusing on the NOW and not think of the potential future and be afraid of the unknown outcome.
FOR MANIFESTING YOUR DESIRES-
62. One of the biggest keys to manifesting. Is your Sexual Energy. Its not all orgasms and pleasure. Sexual energy has the ability to be transmuted and used to fulfill goals and desires, right before love making self pleasuring. With that intention burning inside of you get lost in the act of sex. The combination of your intention, along with your sexual energy, is absolute magic. At the height of orgasm not ejaculation let your intention penetrate your whole body and at ejaculation let it be released into the universe. "SEX MAGIC" I teach this in depth in my tantra sessions.
63. Empty yourself. Empty yourself of the ego. Empty yourself of the labels. Empty yourself of all the wants and lack of. To be a magnet for the things that you want, you must release attachment to them. You must let it go. You must learn to accept and appreaciate all you are in this moment. Only then can you attract more goodness your way.
64. Recreate yourself. You can be a totally new person right now. Stop being only part of your truth. I have recreated myslef so many times in my life. This is evolving. Evolve until you know who you are in the world and then keep evolving.
65.Consistently focus on your goals. They are like seeds waiting to grow with tantra energy and attention you provide them with the nourshiment to blossom.
66. Stop giving so much. NO REALLY. Life is about giving and receiving. Tantric philosophy is welcoming and acceptance of both sides giving and receiving. Its devotion about free falling in the mysteries of duality. When we shut ourselves down from receiving in life, we limit ourselves. We are not able to really take in what the universe is sending our way, so how can we expect to receive fulfillment of those precious things we want to manifest? I am a higher priced ticket in the services I offer because I am very aware what I give of myself in my sessions and I am open to receive what I valued for as a gift from my clients and the universe.
67. The Shadow parts of you. These are the things that might be embarrassing or shameful to you. Those feelings that we don't want to admit to ourselves and our partners. Get on board with all of that. Look into the depths of all those things you keep letting define you. Many people think Tantra is light work and sex work. That is actually a myth, Since Tantra is the fullest embodiment of all things, it makes room for all things including the shadow sides of ourselves. The more you deny the dark patches of your soul, the more you allow them to fester and burn holes in you. Bring the dark stuff up and into the light where it can move, flow and merge. In this way, you will become a more integrated and a whole version of yourself. and fro that place, you can manifest anything. I always tell my clients to bring me all their emotional baggage so I can unpack it. I special gift to getting to the core of your shadow side whether you share it or not.
68. If you want to manifest more money in your life, be sure to keep your root chakra activated. Sit down and close your eyes.Imagine that the base of your spine is extending down to earth. Imagine it is burying itself hundreds of feet down into the earth and roots spreading out of it, as it firmly hooks itself into the soil. Breathe deeply here for 5 minutes. This is grounding.
69. If you really stuck, declutter your environment. Toss out things you dont need, clean out your fridge,empty out the junk in your car. The more decluttering you do the more you free up your energy. The more clarity and focus you will have. Hire a Feng Shui Designer (as in me) to come in an arrange your office or home to arrange your items to bring in more of want want. Bonus- Face your desk North. North is the direction to create money in.
70. Do visualizing in movement. I love to do this when I am working out. I use all my sexual energy when I am in the gym or especially when I go running. I methodically run for a mile only thinking of one topic and then let it go for a mile. This is moving meditation.
71. See the divine in everything right now. Be grateful for everything right now. If you have not read "The Magic" By Rhonda Byrnes I would highly suggest you read it and do it for 28 days. Your whole will change.
72. Love the person you are right now. do not put self love on hold until you acheived this or that. If you love and respect who you are right now in this moment, good things will flow your way. Becuase you are showing the universe that you value yourself. You are a divine creation go start acting like it.
73. Do not become attached to things, because they look shiny and nice. Make sure what you want is in alignment with your higher self. That does not mean not to have the Tesla(I know how you guys like the tesla) it does not mean that you cant be living a billionaire lifestyle. It means that attachment to it in an ego way is true root to suffering.
74. Do not forget to manifest for the people in your life. Take a moment to send love to someone you love or who is struggling. This will not only bless them but it will boost your vibration and make you feel good. I want you to know right now as you read this. I am sending you a circle of love and sexy energy.
For Your Relationships-
75. Speak from your heart. Literally imagine the words being pulled up from your chest and out of your mouth. This may seem tricky but you will get the hang of it. Children respond to this in magical ways. Bless your children with this.
76. Loosen your grip when it comes to the people in your life. Let them be who they are, without trying to improve them. Love them exactly how they are and watch them transform into in the most amazing them.
77. Treat every encounter as if it is sacred. Cherish each moment you get to spend time with the people in your life. That means no checking your phone constantly or looking through the person or getting distracted by your own thoughts. Gift everyone you come in contact with your presesnce and they will gift you theirs in return.
78. Always be curious. Dont assume you know everything. The greatest gift you can give someone is being into what they are expressing. So ask questions, and really listen to the anwsers. If you get nervous socially, this is a good tip to lean on. Just focus on asking questions, and the rest will take care of itself. Do this with your patner if tension is arising The questions will lead you to the anwser.
79. Look at all the relationships in your life. If there's any relationship in which you are direspected or hurt constantly, know this is a good time to practice the art of letting go. You do not need relationships to make you feel hollow inside.
80. Want to change all your relationships NOW. Then check your thoughts. Your thoughts inform your words and actions. Be sure to stay on top of them to keep them peaceful and loving. Mediation is the key to this. Stop sabatoging your relationships with 65,000 thoughts a day about what went wrong or what could go wrong. Ask yourself how do I want to feel? And feel it NOW.
81. Drop all judgements of yourself and others, and you will notice a big difference. Not just in your relationship with other people but to the relationship with yourself. I like to go through all whole day without judjement or criticism. Its one of the hardest things to do but its so worth it.
82. Don't be afraid to share your light fully with other people. If they respond negatively, you know they are not your people. That way you can just move on. You will save a lot of time in the long run. Believe it or not. I deny a lot of people sessions with me. I would rather be shining my light into my people and letting them shine back into me then struggle for and hour or two trying to align with someone that isnt there yet.
83. Practice with energy work. Even if you think its all woo-woo stuff. Open your mind to a different way of living in this human form. Ask your loved ones especially children about if they can feel energy. They are usually not shut down enough yet, They can teach you alot.
84. Read. Actually put a book in your hands and read. I am obsessed with books. I always tease if its my kids or books. I am choosing books. They know I am kidding.
85. Ask your partners,children co-workers what do they want. What do they really want in this experience? Help them get to where they want with no expectations of return but their happiness. I get way more joy out of giving.
86. Support Woman. When a women is truly connected to who she is, the whole world will change.
87. Thank people. I am serious. Humans need to be aknowledged. If you thanked people in your life everyday for even the little things, you will be amazed how they blossom.
88. Cuddle more. Humans do not touch each other. We are starved for human connection. Cuddle with the people close to you. It raises your dopamine,seratonin,oxytocin and dhea naturally.
89. Teach your kids about sex. Not just how to prevent STDS and unwanted pregnancy.
90. Drop your stigmas about how people can love eachother,who can love eachother and all the other bullshit you have been taught and downloaded into your energy field. Love your people. Let people love their people.
91. Find your passion outside of work and share it with the world. The world needs more passionate people.
92. Heal your sexual traumas and let the people in your life heal theirs.Do not place judgment on how people heal its their journey not your
93. Stop using sex as a way to get what you want or manipulate someone to get what they want. Have sex because its a fundamental human need like food and water.
94. Don't be afraid to have casual sexual affairs. You can have enlightened sexual encounters with anyone who shares the same intent as you. I love it when people are honest and come with the only intention is to connect on a deep level. These are the clients that have the most satisfying experience and get to go deeper and heal things they didnt even know needed to healed.
95. Do vision boards for your relationship goals. Put it in pictures and let it come to life.
96. Be kinky,be slutty,be juicy, be funny,be sad,be happy! Be whatever the fuck you want to BE! Let others BE!
97. Love your body. It is your temple. Love her body it is her temple. Love your bodies together.
98.Cut cords with anyone that you have been holding on to in your past. Cut the cords of who you thought your partner should be. If you dont cut the cords you can't release it from your energy field.
99. Treat yourself and loved ones to self care. Massage,yoga,vacations,facials what ever you need to relax.
100. Book a session with me.
In Love and Light